I had two sons who had conduct disorders as children, and one son who was the opposite, ie never got in trouble once, was responsible, kind etc

Both of the kids with cd have grown up to be adults with mental health problems who have continued to face many challenges in their lives. I have continued to offer them support and care, as much as I can without enabling behaviors and with my own limitations as i age

My youngest son has grown up to be a very successful person with a healthy relationship and a lot of happiness and continues to be a comfort to me in many ways

I guess my point is that what looks like childhood conduct disorder really probably is the childhood side of adult mental health problems and personality disorders. these kids are going to struggle their whole lives with relationships and substance abuse and even survival.

I don't know what genetic material i brought to this mix, well, actually I do know that my family of origin struggles with a lot of problems, but I guess it never dawned on me that I would be passing that along to my own kids, I just wanted to have a family to create what I missed myself.

life is complicated for sure

anyway, sounds like you did a really good job with your stepson and I applaud you for that. I wish I would have done better myself.

Historically Curious, Queer, Aging, Anglophile, World traveler, lifetime researcher with a sarcastic bent